Monday January 25th, 2021
The Pink Clouds seem to have come early this time around. Maybe it was easier for my body to get to this part faster because I had quit for almost eight months before my recent four-month stint of drinking. Maybe it’s like muscle memory and my body is just saying loud and clear, to ensure there is no confusion, “Yes! Thank you!! This is what works best for us!” The only annoying part is that I’ve been having some trouble sleeping for the past couple of weeks and I don’t remember having this problem the last time around. Last time I started having the most blissful and satisfying sleeps about a week or so after I’d stopped. I would sleep like a log, waking up early and excited to get my sober day started but having slept through the night.
Lately I’m waking up several times a night, hoping that it’s morning and time to wake up, but it’s not. I’m also waking up super early, like 4:30-5:30 a.m. early and last night I went to bed at 9:00 and woke up at 12:30, 3:30, and then now at 5:30 and finally got up. I think I’m just so thrilled I didn’t drink — and therefore don’t feel crappy and hungover — that I just want to get up and enjoy my sober self! That sounds a bit weird, but overall I’m feeling super excited, hopeful and happy these days. I’ve actually started to worry that I’m feeling too happy and I’m heading for a crash someday soon. I’ve had ZERO cravings to drink since my slip on January 4th, and after a few days of sluggishness and moodiness, I’ve just been feeling FANTASTIC! EVERY DAY!
Obviously none of this is really a problem. Like, “Hey everyone! I’m feeling great! What should I do?” I know…………poor me. It’s just more annoying than anything that I’m so excited to wake up that I can’t sleep. Like a kid on Christmas Eve! Every day! I’m such a nerd.
I suppose I should enjoy it while it lasts and prepare for the inevitable crash. Or at least if not a crash, then maybe a bit of a downswing where I might have to have my tools and strategies ready to manage a bad day and avoid cracking open a bottle. For now I guess I’ll just keep riding the Pink Clouds.
Happy Monday everyone! xx